Is suicide preventable? The question is crucial.
Suicide. The word invokes feelings of despair akin to another hopeless word—terminal cancer. But death from cancer is involuntary, while suicide is on purpose. Right? The answer is yes and no. Suicide, while intentional, occurs when the victim is not thinking rationally, when a series of events and physiological stressors collide to make them feel so hopeless that their pain (either physical or emotional) becomes too much to bear, and they believe death is the only escape.
Is Suicide Preventable?
The answer is yes. In many cases, it is. With education and compassion, we can help those in danger of suicide feel less alone and offer them hope. We can help them choose to live another day. Many times, just one more day is all it takes to allow those desperate emotions to calm down and turn what could have been a tragedy into a triumph.
Don’t Be Afraid to Ask Someone if They’re Suicidal
If you’re concerned that someone may be suicidal, ask them. Studies have shown that asking does not increase the chances that someone will hurt themself. If anything, it gives them an opportunity to talk about their feelings in a safe space that may reduce the risk of acting on those feelings. Even if they don’t discuss it with you, it puts them in a more rational frame of mind to reconsider their situation.
Asking someone about their feelings can be awkward, especially if you feel you don’t know them well enough to engage in such an intimate discussion. But do it anyway. Make sure to show sensitivity by finding a private place to talk. The last thing you want is to embarrass them or make them feel attacked or judged.
Here are some questions you might want to ask:
● How are you dealing with things that have happened?
● Do you ever feel like giving up?
● Do you think about dying?
● Have you thought about suicide?
● Do you have access to weapons, drugs, or other things you might use to hurt yourself?
● Tell me more about what’s been going through your mind.
Here are some additional things you can do for someone you suspect is at risk for suicide:
✔ The suicide hotline. Give them the number to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800-273-8255) so they can talk with a trained counselor. Tell them, “Many people experience these same feelings. It’s important to talk to someone who will understand and be able to help.”
✔ Find them a support system. Help them reach out to a mental health professional, support group, faith-based counselor or community, teacher, or other trusted person.
✔ Check in. Be consistent. Just letting them know someone cares and is willing to listen will help the person feel less hopeless.
✔ Show respect. Don’t shame the person, act shocked, or tell them their feelings aren’t reasonable. Don’t tell them things could be worse or that they have everything to live for. Instead, let them talk about their experiences, then validate their emotions by explaining that many people struggle with the same feelings. Ask them how you can help. Remember, even though the person is not behaving logically, the pain he or she feels is real.
✔ Delay their actions. Instead of focusing on a permanent solution, try to get the person to choose life one more day. Plan a coffee date for tomorrow or a week from now to give them something to look forward to. If the weather is nice, plan an outdoor event to help the person get some Vitamin D. Give them something to be excited about in the near future. Once they get through this moment of crisis, you can always help plan another delay tactic.
✔ Remove dangerous items. Take away guns, knives, drugs, and any other potentially harmful things.
✔ Encourage the person to avoid self-medicating. This includes not only recreational drugs, but prescription drugs and alcohol too.
✔ Act in a crisis. If you learn someone has attempted suicide and/or they are in immediate danger, don’t leave them alone. Call 911 immediately, and if possible, take them to the ER yourself. They may need to be hospitalized until the danger has passed.
✔ Request a wellness check. If you’re worried about someone’s state of mind and aren’t sure what to do or can’t get to them, call the local police station and ask them to a do a wellness check.
If You’re the One Feeling Suicidal
If it’s you, not someone you know, who’s struggling with suicidal thoughts, help yourself the same way you would help a friend going through the same thing. Ask yourself the above questions and write the answers in a journal. Journaling allows us to “talk” to ourselves and helps us process our feelings in a more rational way. Use the resources listed above. And please don’t give up or try to “go it alone.” Reach out to someone—the suicide hotline, a counselor, clergyman, family member, friend, or anyone you trust—and talk about your feelings.
Most, but not all, people who complete or attempt suicide give out warning signs first. They may talk about dying or express a longing for death. They may show signs of severe depression or anxiety, make a will, or make a point of saying poignant goodbyes to those closest to them. Any warning of potential suicide should be taken seriously. Don’t worry about damaging your relationship with the person when their life may be at stake.
But remember, it’s not our job to prevent suicide. When someone chooses to take their life, no one else is to blame. You’re not to blame. However, by intervening, by reaching out and showing the person they’re loved, they’re wanted, and they’re important, we can encourage those who are in danger to choose life.
©2023 Amplified Life Network
